“Your greatest achievement is not finding the answer, but finding and living peacefully with the question—the answer will change (if you are living, growing), but the question will not.”
CG Walters

It’s not a joke. Whatever preconceived notions you have about seminars that say they can change your life, throw them out the door. This is a real thing. The life you want is attainable through this. I walked in here thinking that I had been duped into paying for a fake motivational course. I am walking out with a newfound look on life- A new paradigm that never existed for me before. My confidence and trust in myself is soaring. This course far and beyond exceeded my expectations and has made me a new person. I feel like I found me!

Satvatove, Foundational Course, January 2010
Gainesville, Florida

I am in Vrndavana. Vrndavana is a town in north India, specially known for an atmosphere conducive for developing prema, the highest love between the individual spirit and the Supreme. I awoke this morning to the pre-dawn chorus of Vrndavana kirtan and bhajan, radiating from hundreds of chakras of transcendental sound vibration throughout the sacred village. Immersion in such sound vibration before sunrise invites the soul towards profound spiritual joys as an auspicious start for the day.

Prema- The Source of all Love

Prema, personal loving relation with the Divine, is all-inclusive, free from limitation. Just as by watering the root we automatically nourish all branches, leaves and twigs, we similarly nurture our relationships with all persons by cultivating love for the source of all creation.

The First Duty of Love is to Listen

My specific purpose here in Vrndavana is to conduct experiential seminars on transformative communication. We might wonder about the connection between communication skills and the sublime love called prema. In this regard I am reminded of the quote from theologian and philosopher Paul Tillich, “The first duty of love is to listen.” Sometimes it’s helpful to distinguish between the feeling of love, and love as a verb. A vital action in loving relations is high-level communication, beginning with deep, attentive listening.

About 500 years ago the Six Goswamis of Vrndavana inspired a renaissance, centered in Vrndavana, of prema-bhakti, personal devotional love as a means for self- and God-realization. The writings of these sages carefully differentiate between spiritual prema and material lust. One of these Goswamis, Srila Rupa Goswami, a leading Vedic scholar of the age, wrote Sri Upadesamrita, The Nectar of Instruction. This short treatise on spiritual life concludes with a depiction of Radha-kunda, a place and consciousness where prema is the sweetest. Indeed, Rupa Goswami describes those who have attained Radha-kunda as “the most fortunate people in the universe.”

Interestingly, the first words of Nectar of Instruction are “vaco vegam”, referring to the urge to speak. Herein Rupa Goswami expresses that the first step on the journey of spiritual realization, and ultimately towards absorption in the most intense and inspirational love, is to be conscious with our speech.

This illuminates the fundamental principle of transformative communication. Skills, or technique, are external, mechanics meant to serve the essence. At its essence, the principles of conscious communication comprise a systematic process of self-realization. This process utilizes mastery of hearing and expression to create sacred space. In that space we get to support each other and ourselves to unlock the mysteries of prema within our hearts, and experience infinite and untainted love.

In the same way that top athletes use coaches to maximize performance, we can use coaching to facilitate excellence in our life.

Coaching supports the achievement of extraordinary results based on goals set by the individual or team. Through the process of coaching, individuals focus on the skills and actions they need to successfully produce their chosen results. Clarity is achieved through the coaching process. Coaching accelerates progress by providing greater focus and awareness of possibilities, leading to more effective choices. Coaching concentrates on where individuals are now and what they are willing to do to get to where they want to be in the future.

Life skills coaching may also include educational and therapeutic elements. Coaching focuses on an individual’’s life as it relates to goal setting, outcome creation and personal change management. A coach helps people define what they want and supports them to reach their goals. (i.e. “I want to learn how to create a happy, committed partnership.”)

In the capacity of education, coaching provides people with general or specific information and skill-building opportunities for them to learn what they need to be successful. An assumption that is made in coaching, is that individuals or teams are capable of generating their own solutions with the coach supplying supportive, discovery-based approaches and frameworks. (i.e. “What communication principles and skills will help me to create the relationships I want?).

With regards to therapy, the coach assists individuals in resolving emotional wounds or obstacles that inhibit success in their relationships. (i.e. “My anger started when my father was brutal to my mother.”)

Life skills coaches are trained to listen and observe to customize their approach to the individual client’’s needs, and elicit solutions and strategies from the client. They believe that the client is naturally creative and resourceful. The coach’’s role is to provide support to enhance the skills, resources and creativity that the client already possesses. While the coach provides feedback and an objective perspective, the client is responsible for taking the steps to produce the results he or she desires. Coaching does not directly focus on treating cognitive or emotional disorders. While positive feelings or emotions may be a natural outcome of coaching, the primary focus is on creating strategies for achieving specific goals in one’’s life.

Individuals who engage in a coaching relationship can expect to experience:

fresh perspectives on personal challenges and opportunities

enhanced thinking and decision making skills

enhanced interpersonal effectiveness

increased confidence in carrying out their chosen work and life roles.

Coaching helps people productively focus on areas of life that are most essential to them, whether it is career, relationships, health or spirituality. People today are more open to the idea of being in charge of their own lives. Coaching helps people do just that.

The individual coaching client is someone who wants to achieve higher levels of satisfaction, performance and learning. People utilize coaches to increase quality of life and learn more effective life skills.Clients typically work with a coach because they want to achieve one of the following goals:

Fulfillment goal- a balanced life, satisfying relationships, enthusiasm, or connection with one’’s spirituality.

Learning goal- improving public speaking skills; increasing patience with colleagues, children and other; learning to practice self-care; learning to mediate disputes; and developing consistency.

Performance goal- improving business as a business owner, meeting daily standards for numbers of contacts with potential clients, clearing away clutter.

Frequently, a coach works with clients in all three of these areas simultaneously. For example, a client may want to improve her or his small business results (a performance goal), as measured by the amount of sales per customer. In the process of identifying what needs to happen to create that result, the client may discover a need to contact more potential customer. In order to do so she or he may have to become a better networker (a learning goal). As the client begins to concentrates more on networking, she or he discovers that less time is spent at home. Thus a new goal is established: to spend more quality time with family members because of the desire to be a loving and caring parent (a fulfillment goal).

The author of the Inner Game of Tennis, Timothy W. Gallway writes: “The coach is not the problem solver. In sport, I had to learn how to teach less, so that more could be learned. The same holds true for a coach in business.”

Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakur, a renowned yogi and Vedic scholar, writes in his book Amrita Vani: “A person’’s defects are better rectified in a private tutorial class or private coaching than in hearing lectures in a school or college.”

Coaching helps one develop personal character, manifest the authentic qualities of the self, and enhance one’’s spiritual life.

Satvatove Institute is an international coaching enterprise with its headquarters in Alachua, Florida. At Satvatove Institute, we are trained to guide you to change life habits and accomplish the exceptional results you desire. Coaching is about you, your life, work, goals, needs, desires and dreams. We like to think of coaching as offering our clients a “sacred space” to share and explore and try on new ways of thinking and being.